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...and the cup for Mommy so she won't have to drink straight from her wine bottle.
You say Merry Christmas... I say pass the vodka.
I love Christmas lights! They remind me of my friends. They all hang together, half of them don’t work, and the ones that do aren’t th...
Your gift will be arriving late or never.
Merry Christmas to someone who is smart, sexy, friendly and reminds me a lot of myself!
All I want for Christmas is you... Nah just kidding :) Get me bike parts!
I'm a shopaholic on the road to recovery.... Just kidding. I'm actually on the road to the Dollar Tree
I saw your Tumblr pictures….. You’re getting clothes and a Bible for Christmas.
Bad girls like you don’t go on my naughty list… you go in my little black book.
I'm pretty sure Santa chooses Ho Ho Hos before Bros.
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