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Happy Grandparent's Day and congratulations on remembe- ring how to turn on the computer.
I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life. Wait a minute while I get a pen to take a notes.
I'm sick of all the Irish stereotypes. As soon as I finish this drink I'm punching someone.
Well I'm sorry, but I can't really help that I'm a badass motherfucker.
Dear Mother Nature, Get back on your meds, open a bottle of wine, & start thinking warm, happy thoughts!
I used to care, but now I take a pill for that
May your college memories last as long as your student loan payments.
Your gift will be arriving late or never.
Dear liver, Thanks for all the support last night. I couldn't have done it without you!
Funny Valentine's Day Ecard: Happy Valentine's Day, liver. You've always been there for me.
