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I love everybody, Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid and some I would love to punch in the face.
I'm already going to Hell. Now I'm just trying to get a good spot!
Great minds think alike, but dirty minds work together.
I don't have a "Honey-Do" list... I have an "I'll-Do-It-My-Fucking- Self" list! And surprise! The shit gets done!
Oh honey I see right through fake smiles and fake kindness. God didn't give me a sixth sense for nothing.
Before you tell me what I did wrong, you should first know that I don't care.
If you must burn our flag, please wrap yourself in it first.
You can't fix stupid but you can watch it in action everyday at Parker Hannifin.
Dear Parents, Thank you for giving me a weird name. Sincerely, The child who doesn't have a customized key chain.
When everyone is arguing about something you solved a long time ago, but won't let you talk...