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Everyone needs a smart-assed, sarcastic friend. I'm so happy to be of service to you.
Remember when I asked for your opinion? Yeah, me neither.
Sorry there's no Instagram filter to make you look less drunk in photos.
Happy birthday to someone who is smart, gorgeous, funny and reminds me alot of myself...from one fabulous bitch to another!
A real best friend makes your family question your sexuality.
Make no mistake between my personality and my attitude. My personality is who I am. My attitude depends on who you are.
True friends don't get offended when you insult them. They laugh and insult you back with something even better.
I live in constant fear of accidentally mentioning something I only know about you because I've stalked you on the internet.
I have come to the conclusion that I should definitely drink more when trying to deal with you.
Behind every good woman is a good friend.
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