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4th of July
St. Patrick's Day
Thinking of you
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I'm pretty sure Santa chooses Ho Ho Hos before Bros.
I'm too fucking drunk to remember what you wanted.
Dear Santa, I'm writing you to let you know that I've been naughty... and it was worth it. You fat, judgmental bastard.
All I want for Christmas is you... Nah just kidding :) Get me the latest swimming gear.
Your gift will be arriving late or never.
I saw your Tumblr pictures….. You’re getting clothes and a Bible for Christmas.
Santa has been reading your Facebook status… He’s going to send you a dictionary for Christmas.
...and the cup for Mommy so she won't have to drink straight from her wine bottle.
All I want for Christmas is enough alcohol to get me through Christmas.
Santa, I want the ability to punch people in the face over internet.
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