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Darling, It's not going to fuck itself...
I didn’t invent the word Bitch, I just perfected it.
Warning: I'm in Bitch Mode and I can't be responsible for what happens today.
The next person that tells me I have Anger Issues is going to get the shit slapped out of them.
I don’t get how people can have sex on airplanes. Where do they shower and cry when they’re done?
Before you ask someone why they don't like you, ask yourself why you care.
Now accepting applications for a partner in crime, must have a sense of humor, attention to detail nudity may be required
When everyone is arguing about something you solved a long time ago, but won't let you talk...
That moment when you give someone advice, they don't listen to you, then you sit back and watch everything you predicted happen.
I’m not great at advice, may I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
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