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It's times like this son that I wish I would've left you on the sheets.
Because family is forever. Happy birthday, bro! :*
Behind every crazy woman is a man that made her that way.
I'm having an "out of money" experience!
Sometimes I wish my pet’s could talk, then I remember all the thing’s they’ve seen me do when I’m alone.
Nothing says I LOVE YOU more, than a variety box of prescription drugs.
Merry Christmas to someone who is smart, sexy, friendly and reminds me a lot of myself!
Let's take a break from complaining about America to celebrate America.
...and the cup for Mommy so she won't have to drink straight from her wine bottle.
Dad you've always been like a father to me.