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4th of July
St. Patrick's Day
Thinking of you
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I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun.
Sometimes I wrestle with my inner demons. Other times, we just hug.
All this bullshit made me strong motherfucker.
Some people have the calm before the storm. I have the panic before the nothing.
I may have over-trusted that fart.
I'm pretty sure the cops are going to come question me tomorrow, about the wings I just murdered tonight.
i hate it when people tell me swearing isn't necessary. I'm fucking vulgar, not stupid; I know it isn't fucking necessary!
I’m pretty sure I was supposed to be a princess. No seriously. Somebody needs to fix this.
Tried to count my swear words for one day. F**k that shit. I was born to swear.
Instead of milk with my cereal I use vodka, and also instead of my cereal I use cranberry juice.
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