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Bitch, I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you.
I don’t need Therapy. I have Wine.
Some people lack the ability to laugh at themselves. That's where I come in.
Instead of milk with my cereal I use vodka, and also instead of my cereal I use cranberry juice.
Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
I must admit, you brought religion into my life, I never believed in hell until I met you.
If you have a problem with me please write it nicely on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it up and shove it up your ass.
Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
I love everybody, Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid and some I would love to punch in the face.
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