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Money can't buy me happiness, but I'd much rather cry in a mansion.
We can't all be princesses, someone has to clap when I walk by.
My talents include taking my bra off without taking my shirt off.
I apologize that being a parent is very hard to fit into your schedule but what I did was canceled my life to make it work
God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then He made the earth round...and laughed and l...
I am not a complete idiot!!! There is a few parts missing.
I'm not saying she's a slut, but her vagina volunteers a lot.
Dear life, When I asked if my day could get worse, it was a rhetorical question not a challenge.
You can't fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.
Some people lack the ability to laugh at themselves. That's where I come in.
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