Well, This Day Was A Total Waste Of Make-Up. eCard

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Sometimes when people are talking to me I daydream about what they would do if I suddenly punched them right in the face.
Of course I'm an angel! The horns are just there to keep my halo straight.
Men will never know the agony of childbirth, menstrual cramps or taking off glitter nail polish.
When girls say; "Lets do dinner or something." I'm always thinking "something" is more rewarding.
i hate it when people tell me swearing isn't necessary. I'm fucking vulgar, not stupid; I know it isn't fucking necessary!
Tried to count my swear words for one day. F**k that shit. I was born to swear.
I am so in L-word with you.
I love everybody, Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid and some I would love to punch in the face.
Honey, stop with the lies. Did you forget we know you in real life?
Know how I know I like you? When I think about you I get all tingly in my special place.