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Dear Parents, Thank you for giving me a weird name. Sincerely, The child who doesn't have a customized key chain.
It's incredibly easy to balance work & family when you don't care about either one.
Friends are God’s way of apologizing for family.
Being Mommy means never being lonely in the bathroom.
Just added my son as a friend on Facebook and his status said WTF mom It’s so cute of him that he greeted me with Welcome To Facebook Mo...
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed.
My mom thinks my friends are bad influences but honestly, I'm usually the one coming up with the ideas.
Never laugh at your wife’s choices….. You are one of them.
There’s always that one crazy family member who ruins every holiday.
Sometimes I look at my husband and think... "Damn, you are one lucky man."
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