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Sometimes I look at my husband and think... "Damn, you are one lucky man."
It's incredibly easy to balance work & family when you don't care about either one.
My mom thinks my friends are bad influences but honestly, I'm usually the one coming up with the ideas.
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed.
Being Mommy means never being lonely in the bathroom.
We bought you Crocs to protect your virginity son.
I’m somewhat of a bullshitter myself, but occasionally, I like to listen to a real pro. Please carry on.
I'm so hungry I could eat my own cooking.
Behind every crazy woman is a man that made her that way.