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Never laugh at your wife’s choices….. You are one of them.
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed.
Insanity doesn't run in my family. It strolls through getting to know us one at a time.
Sometimes I look at my husband and think... "Damn, you are one lucky man."
Wow honey, the house is so clean! Was the internet down for a while today?
Behind every crazy woman is a man that made her that way.
Being Mommy means never being lonely in the bathroom.
It's incredibly easy to balance work & family when you don't care about either one.
I will break both my arms to succeed in carrying all the groceries into the house in one trip. That's what a real woman does.
There’s always that one crazy family member who ruins every holiday.
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