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My grandma said the Internet has completely ruined people’s ability to communicate properly. I told her she didn’t know fuck about shi...
My family is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get but you can be sure there are gonna be some nuts in there somewhere.
Wow honey, the house is so clean! Was the internet down for a while today?
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed.
I will break both my arms to succeed in carrying all the groceries into the house in one trip. That's what a real woman does.
My mom thinks my friends are bad influences but honestly, I'm usually the one coming up with the ideas.
Homemade with love. In other words I licked the spoon and I keep using it.
Sometimes I look at my husband and think... "Damn, you are one lucky man."
Insanity doesn't run in my family. It strolls through getting to know us one at a time.
Never laugh at your wife’s choices….. You are one of them.
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