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We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.
Everyone needs a smart-assed, sarcastic friend. I'm so happy to be of service to you.
Remember when I asked for your opinion? Yeah, me neither.
I think I have Alzheimer's because I can't remember when I asked you for your fucking opinion?
Happy birthday to someone who is smart, gorgeous, funny and reminds me alot of myself...from one fabulous bitch to another!
I live in constant fear of accidentally mentioning something I only know about you because I've stalked you on the internet.
A real best friend makes your family question your sexuality.
A real friend is someone who knows how totally crazy you really are, but is still willing to be seen out in public with you.
You're a sarcastic asshole, you have a fucked up sense of humour and you're weird as fuck...I like that shit
Your secret is safe with me and my best friend.
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