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I like to surround myself with people who share in my inappropriate comments, sarcasm and random shenanigans.
Happy birthday to someone who is smart, gorgeous, funny and reminds me alot of myself...from one fabulous bitch to another!
Sorry there's no Instagram filter to make you look less drunk in photos.
Make no mistake between my personality and my attitude. My personality is who I am. My attitude depends on who you are.
I live in constant fear of accidentally mentioning something I only know about you because I've stalked you on the internet.
I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile.
As your best friend, I will always be there for you. Until you post a picture of me on Facebook I didn’t approve.
A real best friend makes your family question your sexuality.
Mocking stupid people is the glue that holds our friendship together!
We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.
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