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Mocking stupid people is the glue that holds our friendship together!
As your best friend, I will always be there for you. Until you post a picture of me on Facebook I didn’t approve.
I have come to the conclusion that I should definitely drink more when trying to deal with you.
Sorry there's no Instagram filter to make you look less drunk in photos.
We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.
Behind every good woman is a good friend.
Happy birthday to someone who is smart, gorgeous, funny and reminds me alot of myself...from one fabulous bitch to another!
Your secret is safe with me and my best friend.
I think I have Alzheimer's because I can't remember when I asked you for your fucking opinion?
I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile.