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4th of July
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Thinking of you
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I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile.
We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.
True friends don't get offended when you insult them. They laugh and insult you back with something even better.
Your secret is safe with me and my best friend.
A real best friend makes your family question your sexuality.
Make no mistake between my personality and my attitude. My personality is who I am. My attitude depends on who you are.
A real friend is someone who knows how totally crazy you really are, but is still willing to be seen out in public with you.
Everyone needs a smart-assed, sarcastic friend. I'm so happy to be of service to you.
I live in constant fear of accidentally mentioning something I only know about you because I've stalked you on the internet.
Sorry there's no Instagram filter to make you look less drunk in photos.
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