I Used To Care, But Now I Take A Pill For That eCard

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Sometimes when people are talking to me I daydream about what they would do if I suddenly punched them right in the face.
I'm sorry for the unkind words I spoke out of hunger.
I’m pretty sure I was supposed to be a princess. No seriously. Somebody needs to fix this.
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
If you have a problem with me please write it nicely on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it up and shove it up your ass.
Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
You can't fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.
My talents include taking my bra off without taking my shirt off.
i hate it when people tell me swearing isn't necessary. I'm fucking vulgar, not stupid; I know it isn't fucking necessary!
Pink is the only color I finger paint with!