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I wish I really was as witty & sarcastic as people think I am, but the truth is that I'm just being brutally honest with them & they think ...
Sometimes I wrestle with my inner demons. Other times, we just hug.
I’m pretty sure I was supposed to be a princess. No seriously. Somebody needs to fix this.
God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then He made the earth round...and laughed and l...
Some people lack the ability to laugh at themselves. That's where I come in.
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
Instead of milk with my cereal I use vodka, and also instead of my cereal I use cranberry juice.
Some people have the calm before the storm. I have the panic before the nothing.
Men will never know the agony of childbirth, menstrual cramps or taking off glitter nail polish.
Narcissism - It's my best friend.
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