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4th of July
St. Patrick's Day
Thinking of you
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All this bullshit made me strong motherfucker.
I'm pretty sure the cops are going to come question me tomorrow, about the wings I just murdered tonight.
Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.
My favorite winter activity is going back inside and putting my pajamas on.
Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
It's a bird! It's a plane! No... wait... It's just that flying fuck I don't give.
I'd do anything to lose 101lbs, except eat healthy and work out.
When girls say; "Lets do dinner or something." I'm always thinking "something" is more rewarding.
Of course I'm an angel! The horns are just there to keep my halo straight.
If you have a problem with me please write it nicely on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it up and shove it up your ass.
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