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I'm having an "out of money" experience!
This weekend should be fun...I have absolutely no intention on being good.
No one showers and shaves faster than a woman who thinks she's about to get laid.
I dont always lose my phone... ...but when I do, it's always on silent.
I wonder if she's still mad at me. Oh wait, she just "liked" my status. We're good.
Sometimes I wish my pet’s could talk, then I remember all the thing’s they’ve seen me do when I’m alone.
You make me wish I have more middle fingers.
I can hardly wait to hear what I'm going to say.
Now accepting applications for a partner in crime, must have a sense of humor, attention to detail nudity may be required
Darling, It's not going to fuck itself...
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