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4th of July
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When girls say; "Lets do dinner or something." I'm always thinking "something" is more rewarding.
Today I will not be Wearing a bra, Getting dressed, Or leaving the house Lazy Sunday
Money can't buy me happiness, but I'd much rather cry in a mansion.
It's a bird! It's a plane! No... wait... It's just that flying fuck I don't give.
Honey, stop with the lies. Did you forget we know you in real life?
I'm kind of lady, but definitely more of a pervert.
I'd let you kiss me on the mouth immediately after oral sex.
A simple way to reduce shower time is masturbating beforehand.
I'm not saying she's a slut, but her vagina volunteers a lot.
If I were a Lannister you would be my sister.
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