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4th of July
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Being Mommy means never being lonely in the bathroom.
Never laugh at your wife’s choices….. You are one of them.
We bought you Crocs to protect your virginity son.
There’s always that one crazy family member who ruins every holiday.
My mom thinks my friends are bad influences but honestly, I'm usually the one coming up with the ideas.
I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my husband to go swimming.
I'm so hungry I could eat my own cooking.
Wow honey, the house is so clean! Was the internet down for a while today?
My family is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get but you can be sure there are gonna be some nuts in there somewhere.
Dear Parents, Thank you for giving me a weird name. Sincerely, The child who doesn't have a customized key chain.
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