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My grandma said the Internet has completely ruined people’s ability to communicate properly. I told her she didn’t know fuck about shi...
Behind every crazy woman is a man that made her that way.
We bought you Crocs to protect your virginity son.
When I said that I cleaned my room, I just meant I made a path from the doorway to my bed.
I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my husband to go swimming.
I bet that when I was little girl my father never thought that I would grow up to be such a beautiful and loving financial obligation.
I'm so hungry I could eat my own cooking.
Being Mommy means never being lonely in the bathroom.
Just added my son as a friend on Facebook and his status said WTF mom It’s so cute of him that he greeted me with Welcome To Facebook Mo...
Wow honey, the house is so clean! Was the internet down for a while today?
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