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4th of July
St. Patrick's Day
Thinking of you
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My favorite winter activity is going back inside and putting my pajamas on.
Know how I know I like you? When I think about you I get all tingly in my special place.
I'd let you kiss me on the mouth immediately after oral sex.
You know you're really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves...
If you have a problem with me please write it nicely on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it up and shove it up your ass.
Sometimes I wrestle with my inner demons. Other times, we just hug.
When girls say; "Lets do dinner or something." I'm always thinking "something" is more rewarding.
Bitch, I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you.
We can't all be princesses, someone has to clap when I walk by.
Some people lack the ability to laugh at themselves. That's where I come in.
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