Narcissism - It's My Best Friend. eCard

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This could be my medication talking but im feeling good
Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair.
My top 5 exercises: 1) jumping to conclusions 2) flying off the handle 3) carrying things too far 4) dodging responsibilities 5) pushing my luc...
It's a bird! It's a plane! No... wait... It's just that flying fuck I don't give.
If you have a problem with me please write it nicely on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it up and shove it up your ass.
My favorite winter activity is going back inside and putting my pajamas on.
Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.
I'm not saying she's a slut, but her vagina volunteers a lot.
I must admit, you brought religion into my life, I never believed in hell until I met you.
I'm already going to Hell. Now I'm just trying to get a good spot!