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Instead of milk with my cereal I use vodka, and also instead of my cereal I use cranberry juice.
Of course I'm an angel! The horns are just there to keep my halo straight.
Even the fish wouldn't have got caught if he would of kept his mouth shut
I'm already going to Hell. Now I'm just trying to get a good spot!
I may have over-trusted that fart.
Sometimes I wrestle with my inner demons. Other times, we just hug.
Your face looks like a pussy and I'm in the mood for fisting.
I used to care, but now I take a pill for that
I must admit, you brought religion into my life, I never believed in hell until I met you.
My talents include taking my bra off without taking my shirt off.
