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I’m not great at advice, may I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Let's not put a label on what we're doing, let's just say it works until we both find someone better.
Happiness is finding half a bag of gummy bears in the bottom of your purse.
This weekend should be fun...I have absolutely no intention on being good.
Before you ask someone why they don't like you, ask yourself why you care.
Now accepting applications for a partner in crime, must have a sense of humor, attention to detail nudity may be required
Coffee... The old school Energy Drink
Failed another job interview today. Apparently taking part in an orgy isn’t proof that I can effectively work as part of a team.
I don’t get how people can have sex on airplanes. Where do they shower and cry when they’re done?
Sometimes I wish my pet’s could talk, then I remember all the thing’s they’ve seen me do when I’m alone.
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