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Santa has been reading your Facebook status… He’s going to send you a dictionary for Christmas.
It's October, so you know what that means....... Merry Christmas!
Your gift will be arriving late or never.
You say Merry Christmas... I say pass the vodka.
All I want for Christmas is enough alcohol to get me through Christmas.
Merry Christmas to someone who is smart, sexy, friendly and reminds me a lot of myself!
I love Christmas lights! They remind me of my friends. They all hang together, half of them don’t work, and the ones that do aren’t th...
I'm too fucking drunk to remember what you wanted.
Santa, I want the ability to punch people in the face over internet.
I hope you like this present better than I did when I received it.
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