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I hope you like this present better than I did when I received it.
I'm pretty sure Santa chooses Ho Ho Hos before Bros.
I’m dreaming of a White Christmas. But if the white runs outs, I will drink the red.
Merry Christmas to someone who is smart, sexy, friendly and reminds me a lot of myself!
Dear Santa, For Christmas I want a fat bank account and a thin body. Please don’t fuck it up like you did last year and the year before ...
...and the cup for Mommy so she won't have to drink straight from her wine bottle.
Santa has been reading your Facebook status… He’s going to send you a dictionary for Christmas.
All I want for Christmas is someone to fake an orgasm for.
I love Christmas lights! They remind me of my friends. They all hang together, half of them don’t work, and the ones that do aren’t th...
Santa, I want the ability to punch people in the face over internet.
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