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This weekend should be fun...I have absolutely no intention on being good.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear. So I whispered, "Let's go Rangers," in her ear.
Club goin' up, on a Tuesday Got your girl in the cut and she choosey
I have an irrational fear of wasting a good outfit on an insignificant day.
You make me wish I have more middle fingers.
I’m not great at advice, may I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Today is the: World Contraception Day
If I’m still able to walk to the kitchen after sex, you don’t deserve a sandwich.
No one showers and shaves faster than a woman who thinks she's about to get laid.
Now accepting applications for a partner in crime, must have a sense of humor, attention to detail nudity may be required
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