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Thinking of you
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Men: if you ever wanna know what a woman's mind feels like, imagine a browser with 2,857 tabs open. All.The.Time.
If you can not win an argument, correct their grammar instead.
Don't forget that blow jobs are like flowers for men.
Welcome to the land where you can get sunburn and frostbite in the same week.
I'm a shopaholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding. I'm actually on the road to the mall.
The best thing about you and me is me.
Apparently God only gives us what he thinks we can handle. He must think I'm a bad-ass.
I'm going to hell in every religion!
I'd like to offer moral support but I have questionable morals.
I'm always available to discuss your problems via text.
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