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4th of July
St. Patrick's Day
Thinking of you
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America was not shut down properly. Would you like to start America in safe mode, with free healthcare and without guns? (Recommended)
If you need to talk, I will pretend to listen.
Don't forget that blow jobs are like flowers for men.
Oh honey I see right through fake smiles and fake kindness. God didn't give me a sixth sense for nothing.
Apparently God only gives us what he thinks we can handle. He must think I'm a bad-ass.
I'm a shopaholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding. I'm actually on the road to the mall.
I'd like to offer moral support but I have questionable morals.
The best thing about you and me is me.
I'm going to hell in every religion!
My condolences on losing your balls.
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