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Thinking of you
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Don't forget that blow jobs are like flowers for men.
My condolences on losing your balls.
I'm always available to discuss your problems via text.
Men: if you ever wanna know what a woman's mind feels like, imagine a browser with 2,857 tabs open. All.The.Time.
I'm a shopaholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding. I'm actually on the road to the mall.
America was not shut down properly. Would you like to start America in safe mode, with free healthcare and without guns? (Recommended)
If you need to talk, I will pretend to listen.
I'm going to hell in every religion!
Apparently God only gives us what he thinks we can handle. He must think I'm a bad-ass.
Oh honey I see right through fake smiles and fake kindness. God didn't give me a sixth sense for nothing.
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