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Welcome to the land where you can get sunburn and frostbite in the same week.
Don't forget that blow jobs are like flowers for men.
Men: if you ever wanna know what a woman's mind feels like, imagine a browser with 2,857 tabs open. All.The.Time.
The best thing about you and me is me.
If you can not win an argument, correct their grammar instead.
I'm always available to discuss your problems via text.
My condolences on losing your balls.
America was not shut down properly. Would you like to start America in safe mode, with free healthcare and without guns? (Recommended)
I'm a shopaholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding. I'm actually on the road to the mall.
I'd like to offer moral support but I have questionable morals.
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