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My condolences on losing your balls.
If you need to talk, I will pretend to listen.
Men: if you ever wanna know what a woman's mind feels like, imagine a browser with 2,857 tabs open. All.The.Time.
I'm a shopaholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding. I'm actually on the road to the mall.
Welcome to the land where you can get sunburn and frostbite in the same week.
I'm going to hell in every religion!
If you can not win an argument, correct their grammar instead.
America was not shut down properly. Would you like to start America in safe mode, with free healthcare and without guns? (Recommended)
Apparently God only gives us what he thinks we can handle. He must think I'm a bad-ass.
Don't forget that blow jobs are like flowers for men.
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