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Congratulations on getting promoted to the job you're already doing.
I'm too busy to tell people how busy I am.
The workday always goes fast, when you show up late!
When work feels overwhelming, remember that you're going to die.
I work well with others when they leave me the fuck alone.
I'm so bored at work that I'm actually doing my job.
Thanks for your concern, but no, I'm not sick, dying or sad. I just forgot to put eye makeup on this morning.
If I hit snooze 3 times it should automatically send an email to my boss saying I'll be out sick.
Sure Boss, I will add that to the pile of shit I ain't going to do today!
My job doesn't even pay me enough to afford drinks that will help me forget how much I hate my job.
