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My job doesn't even pay me enough to afford drinks that will help me forget how much I hate my job.
That moment when you have so much shit to do, that you decide to take a nap instead.
I started on a new diet… It’s called the I have $10 until Friday diet.
Thanks for your concern, but no, I'm not sick, dying or sad. I just forgot to put eye makeup on this morning.
Sure Boss, I will add that to the pile of shit I ain't going to do today!
Being friends with co-workers is like having pet tigers...fun in theory but you still wonder when they will turn on you.
I'm pretty sure God created only 6 days, Monday was definitely made by Satan.
I hate mornings. And Mondays. And working. But other than that I'm entirely happy
I work well with others when they leave me the fuck alone.
The sound of my co-worker eating is equivalent to gorillas giving birth to quintuplets
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