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I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my internet connection came back.
Happy anniversary of your escape from the womb.
Happy 24 hours of constant Facebook notifications day.
The best way to remember your 30th birthday, is not at all. Have fun.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
Happy anniversary on escaping your mom's womb.
I was going to make you a rum cake for your birthday. But now it's just a cake, and I'm drunk.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
It's scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer.
Your birthday reminds me of the old Chinese scholar: Yung No Mo.
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