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Happy birthday to someone smart gorgeous, funny & kinda reminds me of myself!! From one fabulous bitch to another!!
Stop saying I'm hard to shop for. Surely you know where a liquor store is.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
Happy anniversary of your escape from the womb.
I was going to make you a rum cake for your birthday. But now it's just a cake, and I'm drunk.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my internet connection came back.
Happy Birthday Joe!
Happy 24 hours of constant Facebook notifications day.
I just can't get Enough of Owls.