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The sound of my co-worker eating is equivalent to gorillas giving birth to quintuplets
Thanks for your concern, but no, I'm not sick, dying or sad. I just forgot to put eye makeup on this morning.
The workday always goes fast, when you show up late!
I'm too busy to tell people how busy I am.
I'm so bored at work, that I'm actually doing my job..
I'd prefer a job where I am politely ignored and left to my own devices...with unlimited internet access, cupcakes and coffee.
If it wasn't for someone like me, things would get done around here.
Being friends with co-workers is like having pet tigers...fun in theory but you still wonder when they will turn on you.
I hate mornings. And Mondays. And working. But other than that I'm entirely happy
I started on a new diet… It’s called the I have $10 until Friday diet.