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Let's enjoy this 4th of July by eating foods that would terrify our forefathers.
4th of July... Blah blah blah... let's drink!
Than God our Founding Fathers didn't decide to declare independence in winter.
If you serve me veggie burgers at your 4th of July BBQ I will slap you silly.
Sometimes I drink a glass of water, just to surprise my liver!
Let's take a break from complaining about America to celebrate America.
Fireworks always look better after you're drunk. Happy 4th of July!
Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the fall
Just remember that fireworks looks even more amazing when you're not constantly checking your iPhone.
My life would be nothing without Dexter.