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Thinking of you
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I smoked all my weed :(
If woman speaks and no one is listening her name is probably mom.
Oh, you think I need parenting advice? Well thank you so much, and by that, I mean eat shit and die!
MAURY. Helpin hoes find they baby daddy's since 1991!
You know you're a mom when, your fantasies are about sleeping.
Congratulations on being only 19 babies away from your own reality show.
Every time I see a cute kid, I remind my self how awesome it is to sleep through the night.
I wish we had even clue as to what we're doing
Dear, Wal-Mart mothers, Ignoring your screaming kid will NOT make him/her disappear or stop screaming.
Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.
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