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We all know I'm your favorite child. Happy Mother's Day!
Dear Mom, I'm sorry about the stretch marks. Happy Mother's Day!
MOTHERHOOD ... Powered by LOVE Fueled by COFFEE!!
Mom, thanks for not being famous enough to adopt a black baby instead of me.
Happy Mother's Day to all my bitches.
All moms gave birth to a child except my mom. She gave birth to a legend.
Thanks for not ditching me in a dumpster.
Treat mom to a margarita this mother's day! Remember, you're the reason she drinks.
Thanks for not leaving me on someone's doorstep. Happy Mother's Day.
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