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Don't underestimate me darling, I can go from Lady to Ghetto in 2.5 seconds.
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Happy birthday to someone who is smart, gorgeous, funny and reminds me alot of myself...from one fabulous bitch to another!
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All I want for Christmas is you... Nah just kidding :) I want my Flappy
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May your finals be as easy as you are.
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Fuck this, fuck you, fuck everyone. Just fuck this fucking shit, you mother fucker and for all you looking at me fuck off
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My condolences on losing your balls.
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If you need to talk, I will pretend to listen.
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Apparently God only gives us what he thinks we can handle. He must think I'm a bad-ass.
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We have to play in the same sand box, so let's get along!
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If it wasn't for someone like me, things would get done around here.
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Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.
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A real best friend makes your family question your sexuality.
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Bitchcraft : The art of pissing people off by telling them the truth.
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YOU are the SONG in my Heart
Congratulations to Michelle "The most interesting woman in the world" She can suck down those beers like there's no tomorrow
It's not you, it's my horrible choice in men.
Dad you've always been like a father to me.
We wish you a bloated Christmas and shit-faced New Year.