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Black Friday: Because only in America do people trample each other exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have!
I'm playing it safe this year. I'm marinating the Turkey in vodka, making vodka cranberries, vodka stuffing and a jello shots for dessert. That s...
Save a turkey. Stuff a mother-in-law.
Fuck it… I’m gonna be a bitch for Thanksgiving too.
Thanksgiving, Bringing out the best in family dysfunction since 1863.
I can't wait to nap trough 85% of my visit home.
Happy Thanksgiving to someone as ungrateful as me.
This Thanksgiving, try not to bitch-slap your mother-in-law... ...at least not too hard.
This Thanksgiving, cherish to time spent with your family as a reminder of why you moved very far away from your family.
I'm excited this Thanksgiving to eat like the 1% and drink like the 99%.
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